short jokes

your mum is so fat when she stands on the rainbow she makes skittles r mama's so ugly she called bob the builder and he said, I cant fix that- Made by Mysteryguy123
Your mama so fat, when she went to the airport the cops arrested her for having ten pounds of crack -Made by Crazykitteh



Your mama teeth  is so yellow, when she went outside and smiled, cars slowed down -Made by Crazykitteh





Your mama so fat, when she went into the ocean whales stared singing, "WE ARE FAMILY EVEN THOUGH YOUR FATTER THAN ME" -Made by Crazykitteh


Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the moon it broke -Made by Crazykitteh



Your mama so ugly, when she looked out the window she got aressted for mooning -Made by Crazykitteh



You were so ugly at birth, your parents named you **** Happens.

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Yo Bookie so old he offered odds of 4 to 1 on Adam eating the apple






Yo Poppa so old and ugly they call him Captain Caveman


Yo sister so old she's more ancient than everything seen on the Antiques Road Show



yo' Mother in law so old she the only one at the old folks home with a senior citizens discount.



Yo' Papa so ancient that Mel Gibson hired him to offer insights on what life was like with William Wallace



I told yo big sister to act her own age...and she died.



You Dog so old it farts out dust.



Yo Boyfriend so old his birth certificate says "Expired" on it.



Yo Computer geek friend so old he used to babysit Pascal



Your Girlfriend's so old, she invented the term 'oldest profession in the world'



Yo' mother-in-law so ancient she's in Jesus's yearbook!



Yo Gardener's so damn old he remembers when the Garden of Eden was just a plant



Yo' big brother so old, he used to run Track with dinosaurs.



Your mother-in-law so freakin old she's got ROman Numerals on her birth certificate



Yo Grandpa so old his social security number is 000-000-001



Yo Priest so old he's got Adam and Eve's autograph



Yo Archeology Professor so old we found cave drawings of her.



Your Wife getting so old she startin to fart out Mummy dust



You Postman so damn old his zip code is 00001.



Yo' geeky Star Wars friend so old he used to baby sit Yoda



Yo Doctor so old he uses chewing gum as a bandaid.



Yo hairdresser so old she used to cut Betty Rubble's hair



You so old you used to gang bang wid the Flintstones



Yo' home helper so old she was once a waitress at the last supper



Yo Grannie so old Spielberg hired her as historical consultant on Jurassic Park



Yo Nana so old she the only Creature in Jurassic Park they never had to animate



You Gardener so old she uses T-Rex dropping as fertilizer.



Yo History teacher so damn old he was co-author of the Dead Sea scrolls



Your Aunties so old that when God said 'let there be light', she was the one flicking on the light switch.



Yo Math teacher so old he baby-sat for Pythagorus